Le epic biodiesel poasting

"Once I’m actually the sinister Svengali behind one of these people, y’all will know."

Alas, the highly respected journalism industry is up to its usual trick of portraying me as a “significant influence” on random normie politicians whom I’ve barely even met.

Sure. I have shaken hands with Senator Vance a couple of times. I’ll bet he has also shaken hands with someone who shook hands with Jeffrey Epstein. So have I, in fact! That makes us all pedos. While I admire the Senator and think he has some potential, he is hardly a “friend” of mine and I can’t imagine I have “influenced” him. Trust me, guys: once I’m actually the sinister Svengali behind one of these people, y’all will know.

I have a message for this Gil Duran fellow. I rarely respond to journalists, especially in public. But my patience has its limits.

Dear Mr. Duran: congratulations. Nice work. I already feel intimidated by your investigative prowess and that of your fine interns. Biodiesel! Even more—I admire your ambitious and connected career. You did comms for both Jerry Brown and Dianne Feinstein, leaving you two handshakes twice over from.. the Rev. Jim Jones:

A roster of leaders who remain dominant figures in California politics today embraced Jones publically.

Jerry Brown, then and now governor of the state, approvingly visited the Peoples Temple, and Senator Dianne Feinstein, who ascended to the mayoralty upon Moscone’s assassination, joined the Board of Supervisors in honoring Jones. Willie Brown, longtime speaker of the California state assembly, a mayor of San Francisco, and the mentor of Senator Kamala Harris, was especially lavish in his praise of Jones, calling him “a combination of Martin Luther King, Jr., Angela Davis, Albert Einstein, and Chairman Mao.”

From Einstein to Feinstein—Jews in the 20th century. Sad. Say—when did you first learn of Senator Feinstein’s mental incapacity, Gil? And why didn’t you tell the public then? Democracy dies in darkness.

Anyway, while I’m not usually a rat, you’re just too good. I do not want you using your superior investigative skills to scope out my secret location, creep up my driveway at night, and pour Flavor-Aid in my biodiesel. Therefore, I am going to give up an even worse offender in the hopes that, like a sated tiger, you will leave me alone.

So: here’s someone you ought to know from the online lit-right. Anime Confederate avatar. Posts as “Jonathan Swift.” Now, biodiesel, schmiodiesel—this isn’t just about race war or even genocide—we’re talking race cannibalism.

Swift actually suggested eating Black babies! To reduce the population of Africa! He provided recipes! Now, does the Senator follow @JonnySwift on Twitter? And has Elon Musk repeatedly refused to ban the account? Gil, I don’t have to tell you the answer…

But—there’s more. “Swift” also wrote a fantasy children’s book. A racist children’s book. About race war between big and little races. Now, as you know, the Senator himself has a young family… and reliable sources have told me—he has Swift’s book in his house! Actually, as you know, a lot of home-schoolers are racist. You’ll see old racist texts like this one used a lot in right-wing homeschool programs. You should write about it!

How did you end up here, Gil? With a gig at the Writer Police? Policing writers? Is this what you wanted to be when you grew up? A cop? As a promising theater kid from a diverse background—at age nine, did you find Lord of the Rings, read it obsessively till it was half-memorized, and even have your little brother shoot you reciting lines from… Gríma Wormtongue? The Mouth of Sauron? There must be someone who identifies. It’s probably you. I bet your favorite Shakespeare character is Iago, too.

Frankly: you guys should have stuck with Jim Jones. One: your progressive cant, now taught in every kindergarten in California, is exactly the same as his. Two: say what you want about the Rev. Jones, his vision of collective suicide is more efficient than yours. The state homeless budget might as well be spent on cyanide—but cyanide is cheaper. And maybe more humane! Apparently it doesn’t even contaminate the biodiesel.

Yes, Gil, as you see—my policy for the “homeless,” or whatever we are being ordered to call them these days, is a safe space where they cannot harm themselves or others, and their existence is physically and mentally healthy. Which, to be fair, you report! Journalistic standards, for the win.

What—as a loyal soldier of the California Democratic establishment—is your policy? Whatever you claim to believe in, since there is no other power in California today, I suggest we define your policy as its outcome. In that case, you believe in letting these people rot, often literally, on the street, so as to funnel nonprofit dollars to your friends. Gil: it is you, not I, who is a loathsome and cynical creature. But I see why you project.

Dear Mr. Duran! If you actually care about and want to argue this question, I suggest a public debate. To keep the conversation concrete, I suggest each of us brings a domain expert. I will invite my good friend Jared Klickstein. If Jared looks a little funny, it’s because he chewed his whole lower lip off in a meth binge. Plastic surgery is amazing. You can bring anyone you want—but I bet you can get my old ex, Margot Kushel…

Ideally we would rawdog it, without a permit, at UN Plaza. Just streaming live. Skater style. Maybe to X! Split the revenues? But I’m flexible. Your move, dude.

I have not forgotten the Vance Question. In the next post, sadly a paywalled post, we will discuss all the hilarious normiecon pratfalls of “Project 2025” and “Agenda 47.”

Obviously, as a leading leader of what President Trump has called the “Severe Right,” I condemn and disown these projects. It is embarrassing that people are associating them with me and with the actual Severe Right. Undaunted, we will strive to educate the President about the objective structure of reality and his effective policy options. Does he really want to spent the rest of his life as a normie? Everyone else will like the next post, I promise—it will have actual plans. I’m afraid you’ll need to subscribe. Senator Vance is as free to read as anyone—Senator, if you reach out, I’ll comp you.